Text Message Dating Pros & Cons

Text message dating pros & cons

Text message dating: the new preferred mode of communication. Lamentably, gone is the era of the love letter, the love poem a relic from the days of yore. Today we think we’ve snagged ourselves a good one when we receive a <3. Isn’t he sensitive?

Perhaps it’s the ease of use, perhaps we’re all plain lazy now, but dating text messages seem to have replaced phone calls. I can’t count the number of times that a date has ended with “I’ll text you later”, and, much to my dismay, actually finding myself happy about receiving his text message.

Spending days clutching my phone everywhere I go, jumping at every little beep and vibrate, cursing my girlfriend for texting me about her cat.

And nonetheless, we have let dating-by-text go on. For all its downfalls, you have to admit that text message dating definitely have its pros.

Text message dating pros #1

Inhibitions go out the window

Dating text messages are a pretty safe mode of communication, giving you a bit of a cushion when wanting to say the things that you would normally be too shy to say face-to-face.

We’re not all well-versed flirters, becoming flustered when faced with sexual innuendos or saying the wrong thing in a moment of panic. It’s easy to freeze up when faced with a strong flirter, the pressures of coming up with the perfect response besting you. More often than not, the light bulb only goes off as you walk away – the moment of should’ve.

But the texted flirt session is easier to handle. When not faced with a dazzling smile, away from having to witness a bad reaction with your own eyes, your creative juices can flow freely. Much like a strong cocktail, your inhibitions are freed with text messages, and suddenly you find yourself becoming the Shakespeare of dirty talk, penning one-liners that would make a porn star blush.

Text message dating pros #2

Time is on your side

If you are oft-tongue tied, text messages are your best friend. A tied-tongue is usually the product of fear – of rejection, of not living up to expectations, of saying the wrong thing,

Of course, like all fears, it is perfectly irrational and lives only in your head. Not that it makes it any easier. But with text messages, you are being given the freedom of time.

You can take as much or as little of it as you need to breathe until your brain reboots. You can wait until you’re ready to formulate your “right” answer without coming off as a mute – a luxury that the face-to-face interaction does not afford.

And with text messages comes the liberty of the edit. You are suddenly able to write, read, revise, think, and revise some more. It’s like being given a rewind button in life.

Moreover, you can enlist your roommate, best friend, sister, mother, and any other female in close proximity as your trusty editor. Take it from me; feedback and critique may be hard to take at first, but can also save you from a world of embarrassment.

Text message dating pros #3

Never be out of touch

For those of us happily in love, especially in the early stages of dating, we want to be with each other all of the time. We want to be able to reach out to him to share our every little thought and daily event.

With the text message, it doesn’t matter where either of you are, you can always be together. At work, the park, a movie, you are never far from each other.

Text message dating pros #4

Easily ignored

Rejection isn’t easy, whether you’re giving or receiving. We’ve all been on the other side of it, and recognize the sensation of your heart dropping into your toes. Nobody wants to be the cause of that, to have that memory attached to our name. With the text message, you can subtly send your message by not sending a message.

Sure, it might be tinged with passive-aggression. Is it the most mature course of action? Absolutely not. But because the text message is so unreliable, with it comes a myriad of excuses for not responding: I didn’t hear my phone, I never received it, I left my phone at home/the office/in the car, my battery died, my dog ate my phone, and a whole slew more.

With the text message, you can pretty much get away with a level of rudeness not acceptable in normal social interaction.

Now onto the text message dating cons… Read on >>