Online Dating For Employment

Online dating for employment

Would you ask a date to help find you a job?

I was having drinks with my friend the other night when she sheepishly confessed to me, “you know, my date last night handed me his CV in the middle of dinner. I told him I’d pass it along to my company’s recruiter, but I feel funny about it. What should I do?”

I choked a bit on my gin and tonic. Had I heard her correctly? Was the recession causing us to sink to new lows? Were people now trying to multi-task dating with finding a new job? I looked at her, confused. “How did that come about?”

She told me she’d met him online, and that this was their second date. On the first date, he mentioned he was unemployed, but they hadn’t discussed anything further. He seemed a decent guy, so they decided to meet again for dinner. He brought up his unemployment status again after they’d sat down, at which point she told him that she’d pick up the tab for dinner. She couldn’t help but notice his relief.

“Is everything ok?” she asked as he ordered a third Vodka Cranberry before their dinners arrived. His lips were stained red, and he’d spilled a bit down the front of his crisp white shirt. This was the first point where she became skeptical of a future date.

“Yeah, great,” he smiled with slightly stained teeth. He paused for a moment, deciding his next move. Then he leaned in for the kill.

He pulled a folded resume out of his jacket pocket. “I know you work in entertainment,” he began, “so I’m sure you have some good contacts…”
She watched in horror as he began to sell her his long list of attributes and job experience. “I’m not sure how I can help you here…” she interrupted.

“All I’d like is for you to pass it along to someone at your company. I’ll follow up if you give me the name.”
She reached across the strewn glasses of vodka cranberries and took the resume, wondering if she could leave before they were served dinner. “I don’t really feel comfortable recommending you since I don’t know you that well, “ she admitted.

“Oh, I’m not asking for a recommendation, just a foot in the door. You know, times are rough now. I’m not even sure I can make my next rent payment…”

“So, what are you doing on a paid online dating site if you can’t even pay your rent?” she blurted out. This was getting annoying.

“Well, I figured it was a good move to have face-to-face contact with girls who could help me network. Oh, and even better if I could find someone to date in the process!”

“So, is that why you went out with me?” she pressed. “For my contacts?”

“Well, no. You’re a cute girl too.” He smiled at her with his red lips.

She waited through awkward conversation during dinner, and grabbed the check before he ordered another vodka cranberry. When they walked outside to the valet to get their cars, he turned to her again.

“Um, sorry to do this…but do you have any cash for the valet?”

She couldn’t believe how she’d gotten stuck with yet another loser online date, and one that was costing her money. She pointed to the ATM machine three blocks down the street. “I think you can get cash there,” she said flatly.

“Well, this is kind of embarrassing,” he began, looking away. “I don’t have my ATM card with me.”

“You can use a credit card too,” she responded. “They’ll just charge you some interest.”

“Well, I haven’t been working…” She stared at him as the valet brought his car up front. He’s got to be kidding, she thought.

“If I give you cash for the valet, I won’t have enough for my car.” She reached into her wallet to grab her cash: a total of $7, not even enough for a tip.
Before she finished her sentence, he grabbed the cash out of her hand and headed for his car door. “Thanks, I’ll call you,” he said as he drove off.

She stood there for a moment, stunned. After explaining to the valet that she had to get more cash, she plodded down the street to the ATM machine in her three inch heels, wondering what kind of hateful email she should send him later that night. She gave the valet a 20 and told him to keep the change for both of them.

As I listened to her story unfold, I was reminded of all the guys who had ulterior motives on my dates. I thought about my guy friends, who felt that they were just a paycheck for some of the gold-digging women they asked out. I wondered if there was any sense of decency among men and women anymore, or if every date was yet another opportunity for networking, a business deal, or getting a free meal.

We said good night and I waited for my car in front of the valet. There was a man standing next to me, who tried to engage me in flirtatious conversation. I wasn’t having any of it. I rolled my eyes and ignored him. When they brought his car around, I noticed that he tipped the valet a twenty before giving me a little wave and driving off.

Well, maybe there were a few decent guys left.